Lately, I have run across a lot of people who hate Valentine’s Day. Singles are reminded of their loneliness. Lovers become sadly aware their relationships always fall short of what they see in the movies. The daily grind of life tends to grind the romance right out of life. So, I don’t even want to go there.
I want to consider the author of love. He is not the author of romance, sentimentality, or lust; he is the author of love.
Ever have someone tell you, “God loves you.” when you feel like shit? I don’t know about you, but I just want to smack them in the face. No doubt, God’s love seems terribly unreal to us at times.
I wonder, though, if he really does love us, how would it affect us? I understand that his love of us is infinite, eternal, non-revocable, unchangeable, and ultimately illustrated and proven by Jesus. I need more imagination than I currently possess to fathom all of that. But, I wonder, if I really believe that, how would it affect me?
I wouldn’t feel like shit when I take a stupid turn in life because even though I may be hurting myself, others, and God himself, nothing changes the way he loves me. But what will I do without my guilt, shame, and depression?
I wouldn’t try to gain his approval because I already have it… completely. I can’t gain any more approval than I already have because it is maxed out at an infinite level. But what about my pride in what I have achieved, my disappointment for what eludes me, and my arrogance for thinking I am better than others?
I wouldn’t be so preoccupied with myself because I would free of the aforementioned guilt, shame, depression, pride, disappointment, and arrogance, so I can start loving others with abandon. But what about my personal library of negative recordings acquired through a lifetime of mostly self-loathing with little arrogance mixed in for those rare times I thought I was getting it right?
I wouldn’t be so hesitant and tepid about being who I really am because I would understand his love is purposeful and I have great value, so the dreams in my heart would find their way into the reality of my life. (Honestly, it was hard to even type those words.) But what about meeting everybody’s expectations and being a “good boy”?
I wouldn’t be so reserved because if these things are true I would have some sort of overflowing exuberance that was based on the bedrock of his love. But what about always being so serious, reflective, and introspective?
God’s love is more like a lightning bolt than a heart-shaped box of chocolates.
Thank you for your honest expressions of an ‘accessible’ faith.
Sandra – This was one of the personal posts I have written. It needed to write it for me and hoped it would be helpful for others. Thank you!